How to Get Children to Share
If you are wondering how to get children to share, there are several strategies you can use. These include time-out, positive reinforcement, modeling, and consequences. These are great for reinforcing the lesson of sharing. Read on to learn more about these strategies. You will be surprised how quickly your children can learn to share!
Time-out
If your catch your child not sharing when appropriate, you may want to try using time-out as a way to encourage them to share. Even when you’re out of the house, you can use time-out, from the playground to the car. But before using it, you must know how to use it properly. Here are a few tips to follow. Make sure your child follows through with the request you gave before the time-out.
Establish a time-out space for your child. It should be a quiet, boring area where your child cannot access any distractions. Make sure you supervise the area. It’s best to name the spot of the time-out as well, according to Dean Pearson, the author of the book Is Anyone in Charge? Time-outs are highly effective because it forces your child to sit quietly. This calms them down and causes reflection on what actions lead to the time-out.
Use time-outs only when your child has been acting out of line or disobeying. Do not use it simply because the adults need a break. If your child gets out of time-out before it’s over, always require them to return to the time-out. Any excuses that allow them to get out early reinforces such behavior. Once the time-out is over, make sure to explain to your child why they received a time-out and how they should act accordingly. If you attempt to do so before the time-out is over, the child may be too agitated and unable to understand the meaning of the time-out until they calm down.
Before implementing time-outs as a way to teach children to share, you should discuss the consequences of disobeying the rules with your child. It’s best to set a clear policy and stick to it. This way, your child will understand that the consequences of their actions will not be negotiated. Your child should know that they will face the consequences of their actions and be aware that they will get the same consequences again in the future.
Parents should know that time-out by itself doesn’t make the child more likely to share. The time-out can help them learn empathy and understanding, but needs guidance from a caretaker. A quiet connection with the child can help them change their behavior. The time-out should not be long and grueling. Instead, its length should be relative to the age of the child, and only long enough to change the behavior.
Positive reinforcement
Another, possibly more satisfying, technique to get your child to share is by using positive reinforcement. Children who are rewarded for appropriate behaviors thrive in many academic areas. By providing personal attention, children learn to share and develop self-esteem. This is why positive reinforcement is an essential part of the education process. There are two types of reinforcement: primary and secondary. Primary reinforcers are tangible rewards, and secondary reinforcers are learned reward systems.
The first type of positive reinforcement is praise. Children often respond positively when parents acknowledge their efforts. You can do this by praising your child for trying and putting in effort; in this case by sharing for a short time or playing with a toy together with someone else. While you’re at it, acknowledge the frustration your child may feel from not getting to play all of the time with the desired toy. You can even suggest other options, but try to let the child lead the way. After a while, your child will start sharing and will feel appreciated.
A second type of positive reinforcement is a timer counting down the amount of time until the toy gets returned to them. Increasing the timer will encourage good sharing behavior. Make sure that you don’t punish your child if they don’t share their toy. Instead, reward good sharing behavior with praise. You should also talk to your child about sharing. Discuss the concept with him/her. It will help them better understand why sharing is important.
A positive reinforcement method may not be the most effective for every child, but it works effectively in most situations. The downside is that the child may become over-dependent on the reward, which could lead to a materialistic mindset. Instead, try focusing on the token system and social reinforcement instead. These strategies will work best for both you and your child. They are more effective when they are personalized and tailored to the individual child.
Positive reinforcement helps children develop creativity and resourcefulness. It requires a level of intellectual and emotional bravery on the part of the child, as well as parental support. Children who fail often develop grit and competence. Positive reinforcement also helps parents learn to back off and see the bigger picture. It’s important to use positive reinforcement wherever you can. By implementing it in your child’s daily life, you’ll encourage them to be more independent and responsible.
Modeling
One of the easiest ways to encourage your children to share is to model the behavior yourself. Model how to share by proactively modeling the behavior yourself and integrating it into your daily life. For example, by giving the child something you both value temporarily, you are demonstrating that you are willing to share. It can also help to point out that you are sharing while doing it, or how nice it is to make others happy. Once your child is able to imitate your actions, he or she will be more likely to adopt them.
During playtime, use visual cues to model the process. You can even play side by side with your children without making them share. Aside from toys, you can also use art projects, water, or sand. This way, they’ll learn that sharing is valued and important.
In order to model the behavior you’d like your child to learn, take the time to watch how other children share. Learning to share is a process that can take a long time, so remember to use each moment to teach your child the skills.
If your child is unable to share their own toys, it’s helpful to teach them that not all toys must be shared. This will help them develop empathy when others are unable to share with them, and will make them more willing to share other things. You might also let your child bring special toys to school or your friends’ houses under the condition that they share them.
Consequences for not sharing
While it’s important to encourage children to share, they should also be given a chance to express their desires and feel appreciated. Consequences for not sharing among children can be anything from taking away their favorite toys to a time out. However, it’s important to understand that children can still resist sharing and may want their own item. In these situations, it’s best to provide alternatives.
Parents should avoid stacking consequences with their children. Stacking consequences occurs when a parent makes negative consequences worse and worse when a child continues the negative behavior. When parents do this, they remove the impetus for change and create a power struggle. Instead of encouraging a child to behave differently, children will just pretend they don’t care. Consequences for not sharing among children are meant to motivate the child to follow the rules and share with others. However, it can backfire if the consequences are too harsh.
Children have a natural desire to keep their possessions to themselves. When forced to share, some children will begin to hate sharing, which will in turn cause unhealthy relationships later on. Another problem with forcing children to share is that they will feel ashamed. If a child is ashamed of not sharing, they’ll become defensive and will be unable to learn new skills. As a parent, it’s crucial to acknowledge the feelings of the child and offer some leeway when a child is unwilling to share.